Self help satire jobs
I need some help with a data model I created in Power Pivot. I have 2 data sets: one is Sales and the other is Stock. I have added both data sets to my data model and am now trying to create a pivot which pulls data from both tables. My Sales table pulls the data perfectly but the Stock table does not. Some context... When I pulled the data into the data model I added a column which I called DataModelLink. This created a 1 (Sales) to many (Stock) relationship between the two tables. As an example, I tried to pull the data of one particular style which had one line in the Sales table but 2 lines in the Stock table. For this reason, my Pivot is only reading one of two of the lines on the Stock data table. I am happy to share the data model as it is only sample data.
I'm looking for a skilled appointment setter to help me follow up with my business leads in the UK. These leads are specifically in the home improvement industry. Your primary responsibility would be making phone calls to these leads, establishing a relationship, and setting up appointments for me. Key Responsibilities: - Follow up with UK-based business leads in the home improvement sector. - Make phone calls to these leads in a friendly, professional manner within 5 minutes of leads being submitted. - Establish a rapport with the leads and qualify them for appointments. Ideal Skills and Experience: - Proven experience in telemarketing, appointment setting or sales. - Familiarity with the UK market and home improvement industry. - Excellent communication skills, specificall...
...optimize sales strategies and share insights from customer interactions. Requirements: • Proven experience in sales, preferably in the pool equipment or related industry. • Excellent communication and presentation skills, with the ability to articulate complex concepts in a clear and compelling manner. • Strong understanding of customer needs and the ability to tailor sales approaches accordingly. • Self-motivated and results-oriented, with a drive to exceed sales targets and deliver exceptional customer service. • Familiarity with CRM software and sales tools is a plus. • Passion for our products and dedication to promoting our unique value proposition. Benefits: • Lucrative commission structure with unlimited earning potential. • Compre...
I am in need of a skilled Salesforce Developer who is proficient in the development of Lightning Web Components (LWC) and can assist in the creation of custom pages for my Salesforce instance. Key Points: - The primary task is to create custom pages that are responsive and user-friendly. - Your expertise in Salesforce LWC is paramount. Please ensure you have demonstrable exper...identifying and rectifying potential issues is highly valued. - You should be available for consultation and support as and when required. Ideal Skills: - Proficient in Salesforce Lightning Web Components & Apex classes - Strong experience in creating custom pages - Proven track record in ongoing maintenance and updates - Excellent troubleshooting skills and attention to detail - Proactive and self-d...
I urgently require a capable designer to create an engaging and appealing logo for our homeschool cooperative, known as the Homeschool Education and Learning Program (HELP). We strongly believe in the motto "It takes a village", emphasizing on collaboration between families, kids, and their tutor to create the best learning environment. We are a Tk-12 program. While I have not explicitly specified a particular feeling or color scheme for the logo, I'm certainly open to your creative interpretations. The ideal logo is: - unique and original - on brand with our ideology integrated into design - creative and imaginative, reflecting family, education, and cooperation - NO graduation hats please I look forward to seeing your creative proposals.
...ships code that is 100% bug-free, I am 100% certain that the code is 100% cross-platform compatible; therefore, I am 100% certain that it is your fault that the script is not running properly.” Of course I am being facetious. No engineer I've ever worked with has explicitly made such ludicrous statements. Nonetheless, I want you to understand the frustration I have had dealing with incompetent, self-professed software engineers who have shipped me buggy code which they failed to test on Linux, and then blamed me. ******* SPECIFICATIONS ******* I will send you complete specifications for this project. ******* A MAIN SCRIPT THAT EXECUTES SUBORDINATE SCRIPTS ******* To make it easier to modify (in particular, to debug) you will provide me with a main script named &ldq...
I'm seeking the skills of a self-motivated PHP developer, well-versed both in front-end and back-end development, including intricate database integration services. You need to have a comprehensive command of PHP to take on unpredictable project tasks. Ideal Skills and Experience: - Proficiency in PHP - Front-end and Back-end development capabilities - Experience in database integration - Robust problem-solving skills - Excellent communication As a freelance PHP developer for this project, you should bring a mix of creativity, forward-thinking, and technological prowess. You're free to engage this project with your unique style, stamping your innovation on our vision. Main Project Purpose: The main thrust of this project is centered around developing a web application ...
hello I'm looking to set up a team that would help me start my company so the deal is that I want to start a movie streaming company that lets users stream and download movies and TV shows from their phones and laptops/computers and TVs. So I have already pitched the idea to investors and they are willing to invest in the project under two conditions first, I must form a team dedicated to the idea second, the investors want the app to gain traction so if the app gets more than 10000 +active users, we will get funding to continue with the work in two months so the problem is I don't have the money to pay you right now but once we get funded I will pay you very well so i need 2 developers {able to ...
Use the attached images and create 3 renders for our new self-service convenience store. it's similar to a tiny house yet different. We'd like to have variations for a smaller store, larger store and one on a trailer. You will also provide us with source images upon completion (blender or keyshot)
Help me publishing an Net6+ReactJs Project to IIS More details: Which version of Windows Server are you using for hosting the application? Windows Server 2012 Can you describe the specific problems or error messages you receive when attempting to deploy to IIS? SPA not launching when publishing to server folder: https//localhost:44321 works Have you ensured that the necessary files and dependencies for your React app are included in the published folder? Yes, I have checked and all necessary files are included
Hello, I need 5 ushers to work as door selection for an upcoming event scheduled to for tomorrow 19/4/2024, If interested send me your resume and introduce your self in english. Key Responsibilities: - Ticket checking: You'll be responsible for validating tickets and ensuring only those with valid tickets can enter the event. - Crowd control: As the event is expected to attract a considerable number of attendees, we need ushers who can help in managing crowds, maintaining order, and ensuring the safety of all guests. Experience in the field is a plus. Given the historic and iconic location of the event, previous experience in similar roles is preferred. Excellent communication and people skills are a must, as you'll be the face of the event and will interact with ...
I need assistance with buying a product from a European hosting provider and maintaining the subscription for about a year. Key Responsibilities: - Purchase a hosting subscription from a European provider on my behalf. - Manage the subscription effectively for the agreed period (approximately a year). Application Requirements: - If possible, please provide examples of your past work in a similar capacity. -Skills such as time&project management will be helpful.
Productbrochure / Productcatalog Hello, we have technical Products here in Europe an...2 Catalogs. First Catalog with small products and easy products with photos, details, part number, price for automatic publishing via a Excel File and the second Version is a Catalog which i must make with a software manuell/self, because very strong products, which are not possible to create via excel, only a catalog as information and .... have you a easy and good solution for us, that we can change weekly the products because we add every week 10-50 new products in our excel / erp / website and in the brochure than. But we need a easy software which we can edit self very easy, but with high quality design and for printing as PDF and for Printing with Printer in high quality. All wit...
I have a little problem, after I edited some content on a clients website. Now it doesn't show me the content any more.. The site/content was create with Divi-Builder.
We're currently seeking a motivated and highly skilled Remote Sales Closer to join our team at Iresh Homes Real Estate & Construction Company. Key Responsibilities: - Your primary focus will be closing sales deals. Desired Skills: - An excellent command of telephon...telephone communication is essential. - Ideally, you should have a strong background in sales, be confident in your ability to close deals and have a genuine passion for our products. Training: - We will provide you with comprehensive training in product knowledge to ensure you have a clear understanding of our offerings and can effectively communicate their value to potential buyers. If you're a self-starter, with a proven track record in sales and a keen interest in property and construction, we&...
I am seeking a developer with intermediate level experience IOS Swift. The task will be to help me get the example code working from the documentation at This is my first time working with IOS and the docs leave out some of the implementation. For example, in this code there is not map function, only "..." Bids under £70 only please. ``` var totalUsageByCategory: [ActivityCategory:TimeInterval] totalUsageByCategory = (…) ```
I'm looking for a skilled developer to help me create a finance website. I'm in need of someone who has a strong background in web development, particularly in creating intuitive user interfaces and crafting user-friendly web applications. Since the questionnaire was skipped, the website will require a range of functions, such as account registration and login, portfolio tracking, and possibly investment calculators. We can discuss the specific functionalities in more detail once we're in touch. If you have experience in finance or fintech, that would be a big plus, but it's not a requirement. The successful freelancer should include past works and experience in their application. I'm particularly interested in seeing examples of websites and applications ...
...pipeline status. **Requirements:** - 2-3 years of proven experience in business development, preferably in the software industry. - Strong understanding of ERP software, app development, and website development. - Excellent communication and negotiation skills. - Ability to work independently and manage multiple tasks effectively. - Proven track record of meeting and exceeding sales targets. - Self-motivated and result-oriented. - Flexibility to work on a commission-based or freelance basis. **Preferred Qualifications:** - Bachelor's degree in Business Administration, Marketing, or related field. - Experience with marketing department, sales department, web development. - Knowledge of different sales techniques and strategies. - Ability to adapt to a fast-pace...
As a busy professional, We need a virtual assistant to handle our job postings on LinkedIn daily. Key Responsibilities: - Daily Job Posting: You will be responsible for posting job opportunities on LinkedIn. This task needs to happen once per day which only takes few mins. - Messagi...only takes few mins. - Messaging: I will need you to sent one time messages to potential candidates on LinkedIn about the job opportunities. Ideal Skills: - Proficient in LinkedIn and other job posting platforms - Experience in data entry and email management - Excellent communication skills to craft compelling job posts and messages This is a remote position, so it's crucial that you are self-motivated and able to work efficiently. Please tailor your application to address these specifi...
...pipeline status. **Requirements:** - 2-3 years of proven experience in business development, preferably in the software industry. - Strong understanding of ERP software, app development, and website development. - Excellent communication and negotiation skills. - Ability to work independently and manage multiple tasks effectively. - Proven track record of meeting and exceeding sales targets. - Self-motivated and result-oriented. - Flexibility to work on a commission-based or freelance basis. **Preferred Qualifications:** - Bachelor's degree in Business Administration, Marketing, or related field. - Experience with CRM software for managing sales processes. - Knowledge of different sales techniques and strategies. - Ability to adapt to a fast-paced and dynamic work environm...
I'm in need of a marketing assistant who can bring fresh ideas and creativity to the table. This role will primarily focus on social media management and content creation. Key responsibilities include: - Social Media Management: You will be responsible for managing ...content in various formats such as blog posts, infographics, videos, and regular social media posts. Ideal candidate should have: - Previous experience in social media management and content creation - Strong copywriting skills and a good eye for design - Proven track record of growing social media followings - Ability to take initiative and bring new ideas to the table If you are a creative, self-motivated individual who is passionate about marketing and can work with minimal supervision, I look forward to he...
Help with a small task and a survey
I want help for turnitin software
I need assistance with PowerFX list expressions, specifically on formulas and data manipulation for PowerApps. Here are the specific requirements: - Assistance with PowerFX list expressions, focusing on formulas and data manipulation - Help building efficient and effective list expressions in PowerFX for PowerApps Ideal freelancer for this project should have: - Proficiency in PowerFX, specifically in the context of PowerApps - Experience in working with list expressions, formulas and data manipulation - Ability to communicate technical concepts effectively
...-Continuously learn about our industry, products, and competitors to enhance sales pitches and approaches. Requirements:- -We prioritize hiring Indian candidates for this job position. -Proven experience in sales, business development, or a related field. -Strong communication and interpersonal skills, with the ability to build rapport quickly. -Excellent negotiation and persuasion abilities. -Self-motivated and results-oriented, with a proactive approach to achieving targets. -Ability to work independently and manage time effectively in a remote setting. -Proficiency in both written and spoken German and English. -Familiarity with CRM software and sales tools is a plus. -Availability to travel for physical meetings within Germany as needed. -If you are passionate about sale...
I'm looking for a creative and experienced screenwriter to help me with my draft a satirical TV show script. Key Requirements: - The script should focus on satirical comedy - The primary setting for the screenplay is modern day - The target audience for this project is 30-40 young parents Ideal Skills and Experience: - Prior experience in writing satirical comedy is a plus - Experience in writing for TV, online or audio content - Ability to tailor comedy for a specific target audience - Understanding of modern day culture and trends - Excellent creative writing skills Your deliverable would be a well-crafted, engaging and funny script that resonates with the target audience. If you have a knack for satire and a passion for comedy, I'd love to hear from you.
...for Survivors and Their Loved Ones I am seeking a talented designer for a non-fiction self-help book cover project I'm working on. The book revolves around personal growth and self-improvement themes. Ideally, the cover will capture this essence in an eye-catching and appealing manner. The design must be clean, compelling, and attractive to readers who are in search of personal development content. I need: - Concept generation and cover design - Typography selections - Iconography or images suggestion - A design that emits a personal growth vibe Ideal Experience: - Proven record of creating appealing book covers - Understanding of book marketing and cover psychology - Experience in designing self-help or non-fiction book covers - Background...
I've written a concise manuscript of roughly 15 pages. I'm in search of a professional to assist with the following: - Cover Design: I don't have a specific design in mind but I'm looking for something that resonates with the content and catch...and catches the eye. - Proofreading: I seek a thorough proofreading of the manuscript for any grammatical errors or typos. - Copyediting: I need a professional to go through the manuscript and make any necessary changes to enhance readability and overall quality. I'm planning to self-publish the book so I would also appreciate suggestions or guidance on this aspect. Ideal candidates should have experience in editing, proofreading and designing book covers, particularly for self-publishing. Knowledge of th...
I'm a student visa holder seeking professional help with the EB-2 visa petition process. I plan to self-petition and need expert guidance from the initial filing through to the Green Card. Key Requirements: - Comprehensive Knowledge: You should be well-versed in EB-2 visa requirements, particularly for self-petitioners. - Filing Expertise: Experience in correctly preparing and submitting the petition is essential. - Proactive Support: I'm looking for a professional who can guide me through the process, offering support and advice where necessary. - Timeliness: Meeting deadlines is crucial in this process, so I require someone who can work efficiently. Your assistance in this crucial stage of my immigration journey is highly valued. The ideal candidate shoul...
I'm looking for an illustrator to create two chi...the successful freelancer will also have: - Experience with cartoonish art styles, to appeal to the intended audience of 0-6-year-olds. - Experience creating the many variations of melanin the skin complexion of African Americans, as as familiarity with their hair textures and facial features. - Previous experience in children's book illustrations. - Understanding of how to convey the subject of self-esteem effectively in a delicate and engaging manner. I will retain all rights and ownership of the images created. The project requires the illustrator to be adept at creating friendly, bright, and inspiring imagery that encourages positivity. Please provide examples of your previous work that showcase your ability to meet...
I am working with GridCore library from .NET Core. I am having issues getting the column headers to be displayed with the filters added. Now, I am only able to display the column headers titles. I need someone that has proven experience using this library and can give me the solution.
Looking for an experienced DevOps Engineer to set up & document a 3-node HA Vault cluster (Linux Ubuntu) using Docker Compose (not Swarm, not k8s) with Consul as the storage backend (plus ensuring SSL/TLS self-renewing certs & snapshotted backups to an S3 bucket (on ) every time a new policy or secret added). You'll get sudo-level account access on all nodes which are already up and running on Contabo. You'll need to use the latest versions of Docker & Docker Compose. Your Experience + Multiple Docker-based Vault cluster deployments + Proficiency in Linux shell scripting and Docker Compose + Ability to document setup process clearly disaster recovery Summary acceptance criteria + I follow docs & rebuild cluster & recover existing backup + I retrieve...
...customers to use your unique code when purchasing our service. Track sales performance and progress towards targets, providing regular updates to management. ? Requirements: Proven experience in sales or business development, with a track record of meeting or exceeding targets. Excellent communication and negotiation skills, with the ability to build rapport and persuade customers effectively. Self-motivated and results-driven, with a passion for driving sales and earning bonuses. Strong organizational skills and attention to detail, with the ability to manage multiple leads and opportunities simultaneously. Tech-savvy, with proficiency in CRM software and sales tools to track and manage leads effectively. ? Unlimited Bonus Opportunity: For every customer who uses your unique...
i need the small help in share point. please bid if you are expert
Hello, I would like to present to you the new visual identity I created for brands that seek to stand out in the lingerie and intimate fashion market. With an approach focused on elegance, sensuality and sophistication, our logo offers more than a simple visual representation. She is the embodiment of the values her brand represents: confidence, beauty and self-expression. I would like to have the opportunity to create an excellent logo for you.
i want 3-5 minutes (both timeframe) candle data into excel sheet. data like date, time, open, high, close, volume of each candle. (check image for refrence) data should be updating in realtime, no delay, next candle data in new row. add instruction, so that i can edit code my self and chsnge stock symbol to get data for desired stock. easy to use and record all day data, even if i open excel at the day end or reopen thw whole day data should be recorded.
I'm seeking an experienced Urdu comedy script writer capable of creating engaging, 10-15 minute long episodes for a YouTube comedy series. Your work should revolve around stand-up comedy, sketch comedy, and sitcom themes. The humor should be primarily satirical. - **Skills Needed:** ...seeking an experienced Urdu comedy script writer capable of creating engaging, 10-15 minute long episodes for a YouTube comedy series. Your work should revolve around stand-up comedy, sketch comedy, and sitcom themes. The humor should be primarily satirical. - **Skills Needed:** - Comedy writing - Urdu language proficiency - Experience with YouTube content creation - Understanding of satire humor Apply if your wit can generate laughs and keep our viewers entertained episode...
I hope this message finds you well. I am reaching out to kindly request your assistance with the publication of my app on play console . Your expertise and established presence in the industry make you the perfect ally in this endeavor. I have poured my heart and soul into developing this app, and I believe it has the potential to resonate with a wide audience. However, navigating the intricacies of app publication can be daunting, and your support would be invaluable in helping me navigate this process smoothly. Your generosity in considering my request would mean the world to me, and I am more than willing to discuss any terms or arrangements that would make this collaboration mutually beneficial. Together, I am confident we can bring this project to fruition and share its impact with ...
...inventory management system that allows for the addition of product quantities in the backend. The quantity should be dynamically updated upon each purchase and trigger a notification to admin in low stock. - The website should have an order management system that send notifications to customers and the owner when a customer places an order. - The website should have a shipping method that allows for self-shipping and integration with third-party shipping providers. - The website should have a shipment tracking system that updates customers and the admin on the status of their orders. - The website should have a secure payment gateway that requires OTP for added security and offers a refund option (My Fatoorah). - The website should should have an option to add header code f...
I am seeking a proficient developer to build a a Mac desktop application, primarily assisting with generative AI by allowing users to call both proprietary LLMs like OpenAI, Claude , Gemini and open source self hosted LLMs using ollama, LMstudio. The expected functionalities should include: • Image Generation: The app should be capable of rendering unique creations from existing databases, or random generation with specifications. • Music Composition: The app should generate original music based on selected parameters, showing its understanding of various music theories. • Text Generation: The app should produce coherent and relevant texts depending on the context provided. The ideal candidate would have prior experience in building Mac desktop app, AI apps and a s...
We have just moved one of the website from one server to the other. For some reason "php part" of the website does not work, but Wordpress part of the website does. I am looking for someone who could take a look and get php part of the website online. Thanks!
...independently and meet sales targets - Self-motivated and driven to succeed Responsibilities: - Promote and sell our eCommerce platform to medium-sized businesses - Showcase the user-friendly interface and highlight its benefits - Generate leads and follow up on sales opportunities - Meet or exceed sales targets on a regular basis We offer: - Competitive commission structure and potential for high earnings - Minimal training and resources for independent work - Opportunity to work with a growing and innovative eCommerce platform - Support from our team and access to marketing materials If you have a proven track record in sales, a passion for eCommerce, and the drive to succeed, we want to hear from you. Apply now to become our sales agent and help us expand our reach i...
I have a .shopify store, I'm seeking an experienced web developer to incorporate a self-service price and variant availability feature by updating barcode scanner using phone camera in the search bare.
I have a .shopify store, I'm seeking an experienced web developer to incorporate a self-service price and variant availability feature by updating barcode scanner using phone camera in the search bare.
...book and it's all set for publication on Amazon. I'm looking for a professional who can help me with the interior formatting of the book and UPLOAD IT. Key Requirements: - Expert knowledge in Amazon self-publishing guidelines - Proficiency in book formatting, especially for digital platforms like Kindle Direct Publishing - Strong attention to detail to ensure that the book appears professional and well-designed Your responsibilities will include: - Formatting the book content - Ensuring the book is in compliant with Amazon's publishing guidelines - Providing suggestions and best practices to improve the overall quality of the book I'm specifically looking for a freelancer who has had experience in self-publishing on Amazon and has a portfolio ...
We have a task in WordPress that requires enabling users to: -Create posts, upload photos, and share videos. -Publish advertisements in categories such as 'For Sale', 'Wanted', 'Exchange', etc. -Add events to the events calendar. -Implement a partnership tab to showcase partner companies on a map, including their contact details such as address, phone number, website, etc. Everything is already uploaded to the website; however, it needs to be integrated to ensure functionality. This includes providing users with a personalized menu where they can easily add the aforementioned items. Additionally, we need to create the simplest possible Android and Mac app to allow users the same functionality."
A map with 10 planet like a map of a festival make a api or something to use small part of it. What you bid will be my budget no chat talk on price please. Thank you
