Configure Linux to allow some programs to access the internet

Below is my request: 1. Programs or software that wish to access the internet must first ask me for permission. 2. I use a VPN to access the internet. When the connection to the internet is down, all programs, including the VPN, must terminate immediately. 3. I do not have much knowledge of Linux/Debian. What I want from you is a written detailed guide on how to do the above. If your guide is detailed and well written, I do not have to ask you about how to do this or how to do that. The ideal candidate for this job is someone who is experienced in network security administration and familiarity with VPNs. You should be able to write in clear, concise English. N.B.: I am currently using Debian 7, 64-bit, English.